Friday, December 19, 2008

Gratitude

There is a peaceful gratitude that comes with doing our inner work. We all have been able to feel gratitude in our lives, usually for all the positive experiences that have come into our lives. And sometimes our gratitude can come from a desperate place – one where we are hanging on to the positive blessings we receive sometimes in an attempt to keep the less than positive feelings, thoughts and beliefs from coming to the surface.

But when we actually allow the feelings, thoughts and beliefs to be felt and let go of them, we become more aware and in that awareness, we feel a deeper gratitude, one that is accompanied by great inner peace. And what we find in this gratitude is that we can be grateful for all experiences, positive or negative. In fact all experiences become positive ones.

Even if the experience, when we are in it, can seem tragic, traumatic or painful, we will feel the gratitude on the other side of it, after we have allowed ourselves to feel it and learn the lesson from it.

This is the perfect season to talk about gratitude. Feel the gratitude for all the people, things and experiences that have come into your life. Allow yourself to be aware of how these people and experiences have touched your life and shown you a new direction or something that you never realized about yourself before. And as you let go of a mistaken belief and forgive the other person and most importantly forgive yourself, feel the gratitude as it arises within you and expands to fill your heart.

Over this holiday season, take a look at any experiences you have and see how they can teach you something about yourself. And feel the gratitude for all that you have in your life, even if the experience is what you may have defined as a negative one.

Have yourself a wonderful holiday season of love, peace, joy and gratitude.

We will see you at our weekly meetings when they resume January 7, 2009.

If you are interested in our weekly Spiritual Group Meetings or private one-on-one sessions please visit my website at http://www.bettinagoodwin.com/

Thursday, December 11, 2008

Working It Out With Mummy and Daddy

Let me begin by saying that this is not about blaming our parents for who we are and how we behave. It also has nothing to do with how much our parents love us or whether they were good or bad parents. No matter what we think our parents loved us the best they could and did the best job they could as parents with the information they had.

We were born as beautiful little bundles of love, joy and peace. But we were born into a world of societal rules, beliefs and judgments. Our first experience of this was with our parents and most of the first years of our lives were spent with them, learning all that they had to teach us.

What they taught us was based on what they learned from their parents. How they felt and what they believed was offered up to us as small children and like little sponges we absorbed whatever we could that made sense to us.

So if our parents did not know their own self-worth, how could we learn about our own self-worth? If our parents did not think they were loved, worthy, good enough or valued, this is what we would learn.

This was learned well before language became a big part of our lives. The energy of someone else's beliefs can be picked up easily by a small child. No words are needed to cause a child to feel worthy or not worthy.

Our parents may have said to us, "You did such a great job!" but if the energy behind it was not believing it as true, we would feel that. Or perhaps we heard our parents bickering and witnessed their angry energy. We see that mummy and daddy get what they want when they yell so we learn to get it that way. Maybe we see one of our parents not speaking to the other and shutting down completely. We may decide that this will work for us and take on that behaviour, that energy for our own.

We usually have one parent who fills us up or makes us feel good and one who triggers us or makes us feel bad. In the same fashion we have the same relationship with our children, one may fill us up and another may trigger us.

When we recognize this, we can take a look at what triggers us or what we are looking to get in our relationship with our parents and look inside at what part of their belief system we have adopted as our own. Then we can change it for ourselves. When this occurs we can heal our relationship with our parents and our relationship with our parents will also change as a result.

Take a look this week at any time your parents or children may trigger you or when you may be aware of needing them to fill you up or make you feel better. Follow the awareness within to what the belief is behind it. Allow yourself to feel whatever feelings come up and let go of the belief that is attached to the situation. Forgive your parents and yourself for this mistaken belief.
Have a wonderful week of awareness of who you are.

If you are interested in our weekly Spiritual Group Meetings or private one-on-one sessions please visit my website at www.bettinagoodwin.com

Thursday, December 4, 2008

Positive Thinking versus Negative Belief

Positive thinking can be a wonderful thing. It can help us to change our perspective on many things in our lives. The benefits of it have been talked about in movies and books and by teachers of all kinds.

But have you ever found yourself doing all the positive thinking you can muster and yet still don’t see much changing in your life? If the positive thinking isn’t then connected to a belief that backs it up, it is still just the ego mind nattering away inside, leading us in circles.

A thought is generated by the ego. And the ego is very good at leading us down the garden path. It is no different with positive thoughts. We can have a positive thought such as, "I know I'm going to get that great new job", "I'm sure that I’m going to meet the man or woman of my dreams" or "I know that I am supported and the money will come". But if the core belief does not match the positive thought, it could keep us from achieving what we want.

For instance, if we are thinking, "I know I’m going to get that great new job", but deep down we believe that we're not good enough to get the job, the belief will override the thought.

There is nothing wrong with having positive thoughts. In fact they can be very helpful to us in looking at our beliefs and shifting any that are keeping us from moving forward and having the life we desire.

Take a look at any positive thought. When you have that thought, how do you feel emotionally and/or physically? Follow these thoughts, emotions and physical signs back to their origin. This is the belief. What is the belief? Is it a belief that you are unworthy or not good enough? Is it that you need approval or love? Is it that you feel you must always struggle to earn money? These are very common beliefs.

Allow yourself to feel whatever comes up and as you feel it, look honestly at the belief and ask yourself if it is true. Is it true that you are not worthy or not good enough or need someone else’s approval or love? We are all worthy. In fact we are all perfect in every way. We sometimes act in imperfect ways, but we are all perfect. We are worthy, good enough, and all the love we ever need or want comes from within us. There is a limitless supply if we look inside and change the beliefs that keep us from feeling that love.

This week take a look at any positive thoughts you have been using to make changes in your life. As you look at them use the exercise above – following the thought to the emotions and beliefs and see if you can change the belief in you. Feel the freedom this brings as you lift the burden of negative beliefs within you, opening more space to feel love and peace.

Have a wonderful week full of positive thoughts AND beliefs!

If you are interested in our weekly Spiritual Group Meetings or private one-on-one sessions please visit my website at www.bettinagoodwin.com